How to take charge of your Life in 5 Easy steps
Life is full of ups and downs, no matter your family background, race, religion and gender: it could be getting a bonus paycheck, or getting fired; getting the fit, healthy body you desire, or succumbing to deadly illnesses; witnessing the creation of life, or experiencing the loss of a loved one.
Everyone carries an emotional burden, a baggage on their backs, be it stress, anxiety, negativity or helplessness. However, you do not need to suffer and can transform your life by not allowing life to alter the state of soul but rather, you can take charge of your destiny using 5 simple steps.
- Changing your mindset: Knowing what you can and cannot control
“Let nature take its course” — Taoist Proverb
Taoist believers have strong faith in the natural order of things, and that we should let the events of the universe unfold without interfering too much. In life, there are things within our control (being happy, learning from our mistakes, participating in a process) and there are things outside our control (what family we are born into, what race we are, other people’s perception of you).
There is no need to worry or let yourself be engulfed by negativity when something bad outside your control happens because nothing you do could have stopped it; there is no need to worry about things within your control because you are already taking charge of your own life.
For example, if you have studied really hard for an examination, but still failed to achieve the desired marks, there is no reason to be disappointed simply because you did your best and the result is beyond your control. Similarly, if you have worked day and night to get a promotion but your boss does not notice you, it is beyond your control because you have worked hard.
2. Knowing clearly what you want in life
Once you adopt a healthy mindset towards life, you can take the time to explore what you really want in life. However, what you think you want in life may not be actually what you want in life due to external factors such as societal pressures and family upbringing.
Since young, we have been told: Get a good degree, get a good job, get a good house! You should…… You shouldn’t……
We have been educated that our life purpose equals our career, even though I believe that is not true: your life purpose is something that gives you infinite pleasure when you do it because you are contributing to the greater good; a career is simply a tool to earn money (and not the only tool).
We have been programmed by the society to be obsessed with our body image; and some of us go to the extremes to get the “perfect” body.
As such, most people get confused about their life purpose and means to end end…
…I want to score full marks for the next test…
…I want to get a degree in law…
…I want to buy a Porsche and be successful…
But WHY do we want to achieve the above goals? Is it to live a happier life? Is it to reciprocate our love towards our parents?
More often than not, we become so fixated with the means to an end that we forget our life purpose.
3. Plan out your mini goals and learn how to achieve them
Once you know your life purpose, you can then plan out small, achievable goals that add up to your ambitious life purpose.
For example, if your life purpose is to be financially free, then your mini goals could be to start a Youtube channel and earn $5 a month within 2 years, then getting one million subscribers in the next 3 years, so on and so forth.
We also need the relevant skills to start out (vocal skills for singing, video editing skills for setting up a Youtube channel, writing skills for publishing a book) so we need to continually learn. Public libraries are a good place to start since they offer knowledge for free, or you can learn from others’ experiences if you have the right connections.
4. Take Action Now
It is easy to say, “I will do it when I am free” or “I am too busy now” but those are simply excuses to procrastinate. Do not wait until you regret. Just force yourself to do it and once you gain momentum, you will not stop.
5. Reflect and learn from your mistakes or what you did right
The process does not stop at taking action, because as human beings, we always have room for personal development. If we made a mistake, we should think about why did we commit the mistake, and how can we prevent it in the future. If we did something well, perhaps we can emulate it in other aspects of our lives, or better yet, improve it further.
